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“I barbeque because I can’t find my stove.” (from the 1993 archives—WILLIE FLOCKO’S COUNTRY KITCHEN)

(From the June 1993 edition of The Zephyr) NOTE:  My dear friend Bill Benge, sometimes known as ‘Willie Flocko’ died in October 2006.
As most of you know, Ol’ Flocko is a bachelor and as such, is sometimes a bit lax about doing dishes and cleaning the kitchen. In fact, the last time the dishes in my kitchen were done was. April of 1992, There is absolutely no horizontal space in my kitchen, even on the stoves on which to place even a single plate or utensil much less any space to prepare or cook a meal. Thus, by necessity, and because I’m too broke to eat out any more, I must turn to my trusty barbecue grill.
Here are some of my favorite barbecue recipes. I hope you enjoy them.
COUSIN TOMMY FLOCKO’S BARBECUE SHRIMP
Take about 2 pounds of shrimp and marinate them in the following mixture
1 bottle of Wishbone Italian salad dressing
5 or 6 long shakes from a bottle of Worcestershire
3 or 4 crushed cloves of garlic
4 or 5 strong shakes of a bottle of tabasco
Marinate overnight and cook over a moderately hot bed of charcoal for about 3 minutes per side. DO NOT OVER COOK– Remove, peel and eat.
NARSI DAVID’S BARBECUE LAMB
Narsi David used to have two of the finest restaurants I’ve ever eaten in. First, he ran the Pot Luck. This was Berkeley, California’s first gourmet restaurant It operated in the late 60s and early 70s. Later, Narsi opened Narsi’s Restaurant in Northern Berkeley which Operated up until about ten years ago.
Have your butcher bone and butterfly a leg of lamb for you. This makes a flat piece of meat of consistent thickness. Marinate this butterflied leg of lamb in a mixture of equal quantities of good red wine and pomegranate juice, available at the Co-op or other natural food Store. To this mixture, add 2 or 3 onions, finely pureed in a food processor and a few dashes of salt and a few dashes of pepper. Marinate overnight and grill over a hot bed of charcoal until charred on both sides, but still slightly soft to the touch.
COOK ‘ER ON THE COALS STEAK
I Learned this recipe from Cactus Ed Abbey himself. Use T-Bone Or sirloin strip about 1 1/2 to 2 inches thick, have a good bit of hot coals-brush off ashes. Place steaks right on coals—no grill. Leave for 5 minutes. Turn on a new surface of brushed coals and leave 5 minutes- Now place on the grill and pour sauce over steaks.
Sauce:
Butter                                                                          Worcestershire sauce
Salt and pepper                                                             Lemon juice
SWORDFISH WITH LIME BEURRE BLANC
This is excellent made with swordfish, marlin or other meaty fish.
1 1/2 tablespoons chopped shallots
1/4 cup white wine vinegar
1/4 cup fresh lime juice
1/4 cup heavy cream
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, cut into a total of 16 pieces.
1/2 teaspoon grated lime zest (optional) Freshly ground white pepper

1 1/2 to 2 pounds swordfish fillet, in slices or scallops
4 thin, lime slices, for garnish
Add the chopped shallots, vinegar, and lime juice to a medium-sized saucepan. Bring to a boil and reduce hear slightly. Reduce the contents to approximately 3 tablespoons liquid-Add the cream, bring the mixture back to a boil, and quickly whisk in 2 or 3 pieces of butter at a time, adding more just as the last pieces are almost dissolved. The sauce will be thick and foamy. Add the lime zest if you prefer a stronger lime flavor. Add ground white pepper to taste. Keep the sauce warm over low heat, or pour it into a Thermos until needed- Grill the fish fillets over a moderate fire until done. Pour approximately 1/4 cup sauce over each fillet and garnish with a wedge of lime. Serves 4, with a little extra sauce.
SUGAR STEAK
Have your butcher cut you a 4 inch thick sirloin steak. This should be about 10 pounds. Coat the steak heavily with white sugar. Let stand for about an hour while continuing to add sugar. In the meantime, build a charcoal fire. Put the steak on a grill very close to the coals. Cook about 7 minutes on one side. Turn and cook about 6 minutes on the other side. Be­ advised that both sides will flame. Raise the grill or remove part of the coals. Continue cooking for 25 minutes on each side. There should be no flames. This will produce a medium rare steak. Salt and pepper to taste and slice diagonally and serve.
 
CORNED BEEFBURGERS
Here’s a tasty change from the usual hamburger fare. Use a good brand of canned corned beef hash or-much better-make your own mixture.
4 cups chopped corned beef
2 cups cubed lightly bailed potatoes
1 or 2 onions chopped
Pinch of nutmeg
Salt and freshly ground pepper to taste
Mix all ingredients well, and form into four patties. Brush with melted butter and grill over hot coals or in a hot skillet. Cook slowly until the patties are crusty and brown on the outside. Serves 4.
Editor’s epilogue: What Mr. flocko has said about the condition of his kitchen cannot be understated. Mold cultures, heretofore unknown to Man and Woman, fluorish on mutated objects once called tupperware. One’s feet stick to the floor when passing through. On the wall is a quaint little plaque that reads:
“No matter where
I serve my guests,
My kitchen is filled
with vermin and pests.”
In a humanitarian gesture worthy of a Nobel Prize, and to settle an old gambling debt, this writer has agreed to clean the Flocko Kitchen. As soon as the cleaning materials have been purchased, and I have taken all my shots(Gamma Globulin, Typhoid, etc.) I will do what needs to be done so that Willie and his stove are reunited….J.S.
The Feb/Mar Z (click the cover)

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